I’ve always described myself as an “all or nothing” guy. It was a label I quite liked.
But I’ve realised recently, it’s not always a good thing, and my perspective has shifted.
Whilst something may not always be as good as “all”, it’s usually better than “nothing”.
My inability to accept this previously would sometimes drive me harder to achieve more, but more often make me view progress as defeat, with the obvious consequences.
Here’s a simple example from this week, concerning exercise.
Recently I’ve been struggling to get my indoor rowing fitness back on track. In particular completing a 30 minute row at a reasonable pace.
On Monday I tried again and just about managed to get to 20 minutes before stopping (my room was like a sauna!) and felt a little beaten.
I stopped, left the room, had a drink, realised that 20 minutes was not easy and should not be dismissed, then decided to jump back on and try to do another 10 minutes, which I did.
Now this may not sound much, but previously I would not have considered getting back on, because I had already failed. My “break” was only 1-2 minutes, but even so.
The next day, I went to row again. To be honest my legs felt a little fatigued, it was hot bla bla… but I thought “do what you can”.
The interesting thing is, because I had jumped back on and done another 10 minutes the day before, I now felt pretty confident I could do a full 30 minutes without stopping, and I did.
I attribute this to nothing more than a slightly different mindset, particularly around the difference between failure and success. This is not set in stone and can be re-authored to good effect.
This is just a small example, but there is a far wider point here:
Falling short of your goal does not equal failure, it’s work in progress. Embrace it as such.
If your goal feels unreachable, start from where you are and concentrate on moving forward.
Focus your thoughts on recognition for what you have done, rather than frustration for what you’ve not. IMPORTANT: this INCREASES not DECREASES your likelihood of reaching your goal!
Success is not linear, it goes up and down along the way.
What are you telling yourself, that might be holding you back?
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